How to Drink you Ass off and get to your 8am Class

Just to clarify, the best thing to do is stay in or go out and not drink. Abstinence is always recommended but most of you won't do that, who are we kidding. Drinking and being able to be productive early in the morning will diminish with age. When college graduates have a heavy night of drinking, it ruins their entire week and/or life. They are left the fatigued, sluggish for days and impregnated with a shot of guilt, reminding them that they should have been more responsible. Youth is only one of several essential recovery ingredients.....

Informtion: 
The feeeling you have the day after your drink is what is known as a hangover. Your body is in FML mode, it is tired, dehydrated and lacking essential nutrients. This state manifests itself in headaches, sluggishness, fatigue, throwing up etc ~ science class over.

So......you you want to be functional in the morning you have to launch a pre-emptive assault on each of the causes. Don't worry, attacking nothing before it happens is ok. The USA did it in Iraq......

1.Hydrate.

Alcohol dehydrates the body. As the night goes on, you will loses lots of water in your body. The whole night you are out you have to drink enough water to replenish the water you lose, something like 1 glass per one or two drinks. Water is not a magic potion. If you are hammered and you drink water you will still be drunk, you are not suddenly magically fit to drive a car or perform heart surgery ~ taking a shower is equally useless. All water will do is reduce how crappy you will feel when you sober up. When your night is over,  have ready a bottle of ion-enriched water (Powerade,Gatorade) and chug that down before you hit the sack to help replace the ions you pissed away all night. This should take care of hydration.

2. Eat BEFORE you go out.

Not eating before you go out will make you get drunk very quickly but will expediate your body's journey to nutrient deficiency. Before you go out eat well. Have a high protein meal with carbs and veges. White girls are always in a terrible state at bars because society has encouraged them not to eat. A day of toast, celery sticks and yogurt will come back to haunt you the next day. Eating before you go out also reduced the chance we will eat like a pig when you get back. Eating after drinking will have you well on your way to looking like Fat Albert by senior year.

3. Go hard Early and Taper off
You really don't want to getting to peak drunkness at 1am on a night before an 8am class. You are asking not to make it. You need to start winding down earlier on nights like this. Start with a blitzkrieg. Pregame harder than you part. Drink the best part of a 6-pack, or a couple of shots before you go out and time your arrival at the bar to be when everybody is a few drinks in. Then the rest of night have a few drinks to maintain things. By 12:30 you should be winding down and you should be heading out around 1/130am. Late night affairs are out of the question, technically you shouldn't even have come out so don't push it.

4. Do not fall Asleep Immediately. 

If you sleep while you head is spinning or while you are still very tipsy, you will really mess up you cycle. So do not just get back to your dorm and dive into bed. The reason I recommended leaving at 1/130am in #3 is that it gives you the chance to get back, sit down for a bit and consume your ionic beverage before you go to bed. Take 30 minutes to an hour to just settle yourself before you sleep it will help a lot. Don't do something stupid. Most students take this opportunity to drunk dial people they are in love with, send angry emails or leave nonsense on people's fbook pages. If you feel overpowered by the need to do so............screw it go to bed and deal with the headache tomorrow instead.

Do all that and you will be fit and fast in the morning and with a little bit of caffeine you will be out the gates really fast before you crash miserably at around midday. You will need a nap, you really can survive without sleeping, but you did drink you ass off and you did make you 8am class.